Confession of a Fanfic Reader

If you read the comment section of my Wordpress posts "Two, One, or Four" and "His Name is Brendon Urie, Dad (This Post is not a Fanfiction)", you will see that Dika teased me about fanfiction. Duh.

It's not a secret that I read fanfiction. However, I always see fanfiction as my guilty pleasure so I keep secret about what fanfics that I read and like. 

Reading fanfic makes me feel both guilty and creepy. I feel guilty because it feels like I betray my favourite authors, considering that some authors don't like fanfiction. I feel creepy when I read fanfic which characters are real people.

Also, reading fanfiction is supposed to be done alone, in my opinion. Because, you never know when someone like Dika approaches you and feel disturbed from glancing at the fanfic that you're reading. Well, I admit that I once got bored then I read fanfic in public place. It was a safe fanfic but still, I somehow felt dirty. Oh, please help me!

I remember the first fanfic that I read was a My Chemical Romance fanfic. I was 14 at that time and I didn't know fanfiction existed. I just searched for neutral article then there was a fanfic and I was curious so I opened it. Thankfully, that wasn't a disturbing fanfic so I didn't need to feel bad like Mikey Way did. He talked about fanfiction in two interviews with 2day fm and Dose.ca. Check those out if you want to know.

I was 16 or 17 when I read a disturbing fanfic for the first time. I was like, "Oh, this is nice," then suddenly, "What the heck?!" I don't even want to tell what fanfic it was about.

My struggle as a fanfic reader is to find fanfiction about friendship. I don't know why but I see so many ships while all I want to see is friendship. 

Finally, not all fanfictions are bad. I found two beautiful fanfics that made me cry. I was even tempted to share my favourite ones here, but as I have said before, they're secrets. And finding good fanfiction can be such a journey. So, enjoy your journey ;)

P.S. Check out Dika's blog in dathandika.wordpress.com. You will find a bunch of good posts, or rants (according to him). Oh, I forget to tell the obvious, you won't find a rant about fanfiction like this in his blog.